THE BITCH WORD
battle lines are drawn, precedents invoked. The gays succeeded
in transmuting the word ‘queer’ into a positive,
and in some circles (not mine), the Blacks have successfully
purged the pejorative out of the word ‘nigga.’
now, some young women are waxing proud when referred to as ‘bitch.’
For the latest developments on the ‘bitch’ word,
A & O scoured the blogs. ed.]
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century definition of B.I.T.C.H. An empowering name, a compliment,
a title that all
women should embrace. It is a woman who is proud of who she
is, stands up for herself,
knows what she wants, and is willing to take risks, all in a
pleasant but strong feminine manner.
B. I. T. C. H.
BEAUTIFUL INTELLIGENT TOUGH CHARMING HONEST
BRIGHT IMPRESSIVE TENDER CLASSY HUMANE
BRAVE INDEPENDENT THOUGHTFUL CAREFREE HEAVENLY
BRAINY INFLUENTIAL TRENDY COMPASSIONATE HELPFUL
BEWITCHING IMPULSIVE TRIUMPHANT COMPETITIVE HUMANITARIAN
BRASH INTERESTING THANKFUL CHARITABLE HEROINE
* * * * *
When I stand up for
myself and my beliefs, they call me a bitch. When I stand up
for those I
love, they call me a bitch. When I speak my mind, think my own
thoughts, or do things my own way, they call me a bitch.
a bitch entails raising my children to be strong people who
have a solid sense of personal and social responsibility, who
are not afraid to stand up for what they believe in and who
love and respect themselves for the beautiful beings they are.
a bitch means that I am free to be the wonderful creature I
am, with all my own intricacies, contradictions, quirks and
a bitch means I won't compromise what's in my heart. It means
I live my life MY way. It
means I won't allow anyone to step on me. When I refuse to tolerate
injustice and speak up against it, I am defined as a bitch.
same thing happens when I take time for myself instead of being
everyone's maid, or when
I act a little selfish.
proud to be a bitch! It means I have the courage and strength
to allow myself to be who I
truly am and won't become anyone else's idea of what they think
I "should" be.
outspoken, opinionated, and determined. By God, I want what
is right, and I want what I
want, and there is nothing wrong with that!
try to stomp on me, try to douse my inner flame, try to squash
every ounce of beauty I hold
within me. You won't succeed. And if that makes me a bitch,
so be it. I embrace the title and am proud to bear it.
Bitch can be such a foul, insulting word. I tend to think
the opposite. While I hate to use the same word that so many
others do I have to admit that I love the ring of it. It's
a term of endearment to me. If a women cuts me off in traffic
or makes me angry in the workplace you will never hear me
call her such a special and meaningful word. It's reserved
for only my special women that have earned such a title. Now
I know many seem to think that you can not make such a vile
word a good thing. Much like the N word that was used to degrade
and dehumanize blacks for so long. How can you turn around
say that being a bitch is now acceptable? Truthfully, I have
no real answer or excuse. I use it with no remorse and only
the ladies to whom I direct it to can only truly know just
what I mean and how I feel when I call them that. Either you
get it or you don't.
A bitch is made
up of many different ingredients. She is part women, part
lady, part little girl, part slut, part brat, part intellectual,
part whore, part energy being, part blonde. She carries herself
with an air of class and sophistication and knows how to reveal
each one of her many sides only when the right man is able
to bring it out of her. She knows how to manipulate her man
without being manipulative. She has a sense of naive expectancy
that comes across as being demanding without being gold diggish.
She knows when to talk and when to be quiet and let her man
handle things. Although she might dress with elegance there
is always just that one thing she wears or does that makes
you raise one eyebrow. Like a grey business suit with fishnets
or that stiletto with the ankle straps. Or the eye shadow
that's just a wee bit too much but then again your not so
sure. A happy bitch can never be mistaken because she floats
when she walks with such a strong energy force that will have
every man turning around to see who just came in the room.
When a bitch is happy she will keep her man motivated and
supplied with energy. He will have no need to go to anyone
else to supply his needs.
Every women is
not a bitch. A bitch is born with the core makings of one
but she can not truly realize her true bitch potential without
the help of a man. It's kind of like how a women is born with
all the eggs she will ever have in her lifetime but if they
are not used they are discarded every month. It's the same
with the B potential. It's all there from birth but with out
the proper fertilization and grooming of a man she will never
fully develop that which is truly within her. I pride myself
on "pre-grooming" my little girls to be bitches.
I call them my lil bitches . . . .of course not to their face
so don't call DEFACS on me. They are coming along quite nicely
and should one day make a fine wife for the right man (whom
their daddy will choose for them of course).
A bitch is true
to her man, always there for him and his needs. A bitch will
also try her man constantly. Testing him to make sure he can
handle her. She will push him, consciously or unconsciously
. . . to the point that he will verbally and if necessary
physically put her in her place. She wants to emphatically
know that she is safe to dwell in her little bitch world and
she can float safely knowing that her man will keep her in
Behind every successful
man is a Bitch. We all saw what Clinton was doing to continue
his success. Hilary is not a Bitch. She is a scary man with
a vagina. A bitch does not want power, she simply wants to
be around power and be the recipient of its results.
It takes a true
man to groom and handle a bitch. A bitch can sense a weak
punk and will quickly overcome him, use him and move on to
the next weak punk. A real man will only have to rule with
his voice and his presence and if that is not enough it should
only take one instance with him to know that his is not fucking
around. A bitch will respect that and won't test him again.
I know what I need in my life, A bitch. A regular women can
not satisfy me. I need someone to match and complement my
personality, someone who instinctively knows exactly how to
handle me and knows how she needs to be handled. You would
think this would not be so difficult to find but sadly in
today's world of video vixen wannabees and ghetto fab queens
I often wonder if the art of being a bitch is lost.
Men, have you
hugged your Bitch today?
Throughout this blog you will hear me refer to my friend, Roni,
as “My Bitch”. This is a term of endearment that
we call each other and in no way is derogatory or defamatory.
A long time ago when Roni and I were barely out of the teenager
stage, we lived together for a short while. During that time
we had monstrous parties with lots of alcohol and people. During
such a gathering, Roni and I being quite drunk, we were sitting
in her bedroom talking. I turned around to get my drink and
when I turned back, Roni was gone. As I was too drunk to walk
straight, I crawled into the living room, all the while screaming
“My Bitch, My Bitch, Where are you My Bitch. She would
answer back: “I’m over here baby, your Bitch is
over here!” It was a big joke and everyone laughed . .
. but it stuck.
And ever since then we have called each other “My Bitch”.
I even wrote a “Bitch Handbook”. . . that I may
one day place here on my blog.
From The Student
File (Pomona College – Catherine Kenodle)
I am a bitch. According to a certain "Bitch Test"
administered by a certain website, I rate 39%, which is 1% above
the average. While I embrace this ascription, I regard it as
a culturally contingent one. It's probably one of the most interesting
words out there. It seems to have survived the vicissitudes
of linguistic fashion, as the process of embracing in itself
has proliferated new meanings which mediate between mass culture
and the general interests of feminism. I guess you could say,
we (18-22ish) grew up with whatever "bitch" has come
to mean. Which is not to say we're living in "Generation
Bitch," because there are some serious failings (i.e. negative
connotations for women) of the word in adequately and consistently
referring to women.
basic definition of "bitch" today refers to a (modern)
woman who uses power efficiently through interpersonal actions.
Sounds like the definition of "being a man."
The cult of "bitch"
sometimes separates itself from the movement of feminism; many
cultural critics have called the bitch movement a "post
feminist" one for that basic sentiment. Everything is divided
and similar to the way in which "feminism" continues
to be a misused term in the American vernacular: feminists align
themselves with sects of the "bitch" movement, or
totally reject it. Those who uphold it as a viable and interesting
term - like me - are more concerned with its transmission and
the history associated with it. Obviously I hate the word "slut"
but I think it's an interesting word; maybe we should institute
an "image awareness" week or "slut/bitch awareness"
week. There are several fascinating projects centered around
being a "bitch" that have recently come to my attention.
The best starting
place for the new-comer to bitchdom would have to be the website
based on the word bitch. Here, we are reminded of the word's
diversity. The more misogynistic connotations of the possessive
form - namely "so-and-so's bitch" or "my/who's/his
bitch," "the bitch's son . . . " a.k.a. "son
of a bitch" and the construed meaning of "gangsta
bitch" - have been effectively altered to mean something
separate from gender, as anyone can be anyone else's bitch nowadays.
It's almost a term of endearment, at least when it's adopted
as a fronting label. The beauty lies in the word's transcending
(originally negative) power when used behind the back of the
supposed bitch. It's intention, then, is to unite two people
or groups of people in their mutual dislike of a third. This
makes "bitch" a secretive term, but with a new potential
as more people are incorporating it into their inexplicit vernacular.
Next, the magazine,
Bitch: the noun, the verb, the
magazine, considers the intersection
of feminism with pop culture. That's right, feminism. While
it ascribes to a feminist goal of critiquing the oddities and
overall foibles of our corporate-run nation-state, the magazine
recognizes the sentiments of its concept's subscribers who are
actively examining "the meaning of bitch" and distancing
themselves from the feminist movement, which, by the way is
expansive and hard to identify in itself: it's kind of like
LA nowadays. You have to ask, "Where is it? What is it?"
So anyway, many see embracing bitch as part and parcel to an
overall "post feminist backlash." Kind of like how
LA is a Po-Mo backlash in itself. Huh?
The recent history
of "bitch" is the subject of Elizabeth Wurtzel's witty
diatribe of a book, Bitch: In Praise of Difficult Women.
It reads not unlike her stance on popular culture's influence
on the national movement towards depression in Prozac Nation.
Perhaps one day Bitch will rightly be considered the prototype
"po-fem backlash." Sigh . . . . Wurtzel's considerations
of the Amy Fisher drama exculpates the actual actors in light
of the nation's more intimate involvement. Yes, watching "Amy"
get statutorily raped on an unprecedented three stations' coverings
counts as grossly intimate involvement, consider the ratings
battles over it. Do I think Drew Barrymore won. Mostly, she
relates modern cultural stories like Amy's in light of classic
models of the "bitch" or "bad woman" like
Delilah et al.
Last but not least
is the website phenomena of "Crazy-Bitch.com." Basically,
an asshole named Dave launched it as a forum for discussing
his crazy-bitch ex. My own "Crazy-Bitch" baby tee
is in the mail. Hypocrisy in consumerism is so pop, right? So,
back in the day, after this aspiring "crazy-bitch"
found out her Dave was sleeping with his secretary, she finds
the secretary's number in his Rolodex no less; the women scheme
Dave's downfall, and are successful. The damage: his apartment
is sacked, I mean really sacked. His question - the entire motive
of his website - is, "Did she outdo herself?" In other
words, the etiquette of bitchdom, which is basically respected
in the wake of our "grrrl power" sensibilities, is
in question: I often ponder the question of where the thin line
lies between a bitch and a crazy-bitch? I've written Dave -
and you can too. My opinion (namely, he deserved it, but it's
not a total tragedy for he has risen from this tragic abyss
he brought upon himself - the scheezy bastard - and hallmarked
a very entertaining website) differing dramatically from Howard
Stern's, which you can find on his site www.crazy-bitch.com.